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- best friend: i didn't really pay attention during the avengers i didn't like it
- police man: so you're sure he stabbed himself 12 times?
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- News in Britain: Stamps have gone up 14 pence
- News in Canada: Moose on the loose downtown
- News in America: Cannibal eats man's face
- Britain: wat.
- News in America: Man throws intestines at police
- Britain: wat
- News in America: Man eats roommate's heart and brain
- News in Canada: Porn star murders lover and mails body parts to government headquarters.
- Britain: Shit Canada.
- America: You fucked up.
- Canada: Man saws off own foot to avoid work
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